Saturday, March 24, 2012

How long will it be?

Today is Saturday and I went to get my hair cut. It's the shortest cut of all among all my haircuts before this in all these years... I made a record. I feel weird seeing it short =_= well, need time to get used to it. It somehow curl a little when I blow it , but just now felt beh tahan, felt hot, so I stop blowing and went to grab my dinner.
I felt moody lately.. about my work, and when I reach home, got nothing else better to play. I play my smartphone games but the battery don't last. I want to chat with people but no one is free to chat. I spam on facebook wall, spam on other facebook wall as well hahahaha and some felt annoyed ;P oh well, I reach my purpose hahahaha. I did mean to make them annoyed anyway.
My mum was busy with her cooking things..she is busy making salted vegetables tonight and I dont seems to bother.. I know she will feel beh song because these few weeks I don't really bother much about her HAHAHAHAHA
And my brother.. still the old him. Busy finding money for himself only... One day.. that one day will come. One day he will need to bear all the household expenses by himself.. he want to use streamyx? pay himself. he want watch DVD? buy himself.. he want eat cold storage food, biscuits, buy himself then. I will not bother.
Tomorrow is Sunday, mum said to go out in the morning to buy pork. I never like sunday. Sunday means I have to stay at home whole day and wait for the Monday doom day to come. It's a horrible feeling.. kalau aku ada kereta di tangan..tak pandai pandu pun I paksa diri pandu. masuk semak pun masuk jer lah. but too bad.. no car in hand. Even if I have a car right now in hand, where would I put it? where? My brother park his luxury kenari right in the middle of the garage because he said he is scare that his luxury kenari will get scratch. Whenever our neighbor puppy drop by, he shoo them away as he see's an elephant stepping in. Perlu kah? (my heart says).
All his act show 1 thing. I shall never have a piece of space here in my mum's house.. here in the house where I pour almost all my money in. I still remember there is a time where I said I want to quit my part time job teaching tuition at my aunt place. I never like to work with her. It's like killing yourself softly in a witch house. Guess what my mum said to me? "Home need money, just do the extra job since your daytime job salary so small". Tears want to pour out. I never had choices in life even I'm already walking out to work!
It's horrible... I'm 28 now.. nearly 30. Sometimes, I just don't even want to give a damn of what people might said. I'm old enough. You don't like it? Fine, I wont said it and you won't know. End of story. This is what I will do. Always have to think for others but how many would think of me and treat me as queen once in a while? =_="
I'm so lazy to give full commitment in my job as well.. I have a management which is BLIND. I'll do in the way I like and not in the way they like. Don't like me? Fired me la. Afterall I have my increment for this year and I don't give a damn. What about next year? well, see if I'm still around then.